Wife : Do you want dinner?
Husband : Sure, what are my choices?
Wife : Yes and no.

What is the Difference Between Mother & Wife ?
A - One Woman Brings U into this world crying...
&
the other ensures U Continue to do so.

Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire?
Millionaire: I owe everything to my wife.

Interviewer: Wow, she must be some woman.
Interviewer: What were you before you married her?
Millionaire: A Billionaire

Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Darling : When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.

Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Darling : Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, What other problem Can there be greater than this one?

wife:honey,what r u looking 4?
husband: nothing

wife:why have u been reading our marriage certificate 4 an hour ?
husband: i was just looking 4 the expiry date

Woman Buys A New Sim
Card Puts It In Her Phone
And Decides To Surprise Her
Husband Who Is Seated On
The Couch In The Living Room.

She Goes To The Kitchen,
Calls Her Husband With
The New Number:

Hello Darling
The Husband Responds
In A Low Tone:

Let Me Call U Back
Later Honey, The Dumb
Lady Is In The Kitchen.. =P

A man received d phone
from emergency room of hospital

Doctor: Your wife was in a fatal car
accident & I've bad n good news.
The bad news is,
She has lost both arms n legs n
will b on a respirator d rest of her life.

Man: 0h my God, whats the good
news?

Doctor: I'm kidding, She is Dead... =P =D